I take a look at myself now, I look at the confidence I have in myself, in the positive attitude I try to carry, and I see the reflection of a tremendous life-changing experience I had in the Summer of 1999. It all has to do with one very special place that I fell in love with over 9 summers ago as a little girl; Sugar Creek Bible Camp.

That summer, 13 other high school students and I partook in the staff training program, a 3 week stay where you become like junior staff; working with the day campers, toiling in the kitchen, and shadowing counselors. This program shows you the camp through the perspective of directors and staff, and allows you to be a very integral part of camp. Spending 3 weeks with the same counselors, you get to know them better as people, and they became friends that we would not soon forget.

While I was there, I experienced a revelation, I guess you could call it. Thursday night of the first week, I suddenly found myself overwhelmed by sobs and tears for no apparent reason that I could think of. Through the outreaching of the wonderful people there and through my own experiences over the next few weeks, I finally realized what was wrong. I had been lost. Lost in a world, in a person that wasn’t really me. In high school I had been trying so hard to be liked and to be accepted that I had lost sight of most of what I was, of what made me, me. And here, in this beautiful camp, I had rediscovered my faith… and myself.

I don’t think that some of the counselors at camp realize just how much they helped me, how much they touched my heart and soul, and how much they truly mean to me. By showing me compassion and friendship, they opened up my heart to truths I had tried to deny. They set an example that I willingly set out to follow. I felt that I was immediately accepted and loved for who I was, no matter the outside, no matter the past, no matter the insecurities. I finally placed compassion, caring, help, acceptance of others and most of all, happiness, back into the forefront of my personality. My morals and self-respect, some of which I had started to sacrifice while trying to “fit in,” were set firmly back in place. To be at peace and happy with my life and who I was; I don’t think I had ever truly felt that since before high school. (Thank you, Ben! You were my rock; may God bless you always)

I’ve had powerful feelings surge through my spirit at camp before, but for some reason, during my stay at camp this summer, something made it all stick. I threw myself into the program, into the songs, into others. My faith is stronger than ever. I can truly say, “I have been saved” and believe it. My life has turned around in some ways. I have put a challenge to myself; no matter how lonely I think I am during this next school year, no matter how things get me down, I am going to tell myself, “No, you are NOT alone. You have a God who is with you always, and friends who are just a letter or a phone call away.” Without camp, I would never have been able to say that. Or to say of those who would discourage me or put me down, “You know nothing of me. I am confidant in who I am.” It even changed me so much as to redirect the considerations about my college major and profession. There is just a feeling inside, like I have finally accepted myself, and maybe that’s what it was all about.

Just being able to look in the mirror and say, “You’re okay. You’re smart, you’re talented and you are loved. Things are going to all work out.” I have a positive attitude now; I have realized that life is too short to worry about the small stuff. Complaining isn’t worth it. You’re life is what you make of it, so you have no right to complain. Pray, read the bible, reach out and give love to others. These are some of the things that I remind myself of and think about daily now. I talk to the Lord daily, I confess my fears to Him, and I HAVE NEVER FELT SO STRONG.

I realized my own potential to be staff, to work with kids and maybe get the chance to help them the way others have helped me. But more importantly, I learned my potential to be a better person. This summer I will be working in the kitchen at Sugar Creek, re-strengthening my belief in God, the Son and the Holy Spirit and proceeding farther along on my personal faith journey, with some of the very same people who helped me so much last year.

Every so often, I hear a phrase or a song that echoes of familiar voices that I have come to love. Through laughter, music, worship, campfires, a high ropes challenge course, friendships, talks, my tears, and those of others, it was the best time at Sugar Creek I’ve ever had. Yet I hope each and every summer I pass there will be as equally unique and important to my life. To those who have always known where they fit in, then all of this may not seem like a big thing. And maybe you can’t imagine the kind of impact that one camp affected my life and who I am. But I know this; without that experience this summer I would be a different person. I would be lonely, overly sensitive with a single phrase throwing me into depression, quiet, brooding, and I would pull away from people and things I don’t know. I have learned to love myself, and in doing so, have come to love and see so much more.

The proof that the power of God can change people? I’m proof. I believe in Christ with my heart and soul. I seek to learn more about God and His word through reading the Bible and having others teach me. I want to help others establish their own relationship with Christ. I still have much, much, much, MUCH to learn, and I am fairly naïve in the teachings of our Lord, but I am ready to listen, learn and grow.

God Bless,
Alissa Reeves
E-Mail: cats_18@yahoo.com